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Phone use has skyrocketed, phone etiquette has not. In fact it seems they are inversely related. The more we use phones the less we know how to act on them. This essay is an attempt to correct that by offering some time tested tips on how to use a phone to call someone one. While this is the last use to which most people put their cellphones to use these days, it is still something that is done enough to require some sort of arbitrary rules to govern behavior whilst using.